The founder of CNN, Ted Turner, says that global warming will lead to cannibalism in 30-40 years.  Strangely enough, Ted Turner also owns a restaurant chain named Ted’s Montana Grill.  The restaurants specialty?  Bison Burgers.  Let’s hope that Ted does not get any ideas to serve human burgers 30-40 years down the road.

According to reports, Mr. Turner indicated that Iraq insurgents are nothing more then patriots - defending their homeland against the US occupation.  Mr. Turner also indicated that our military budget is too high, surpassing the military budgets of 190 nations combined.  He indicated China does not want to invade us, that they “just want to sell us shoes.”

Philippine health officials are sending out a message to its citizens; crucifixion can be bad for your health.

Every Good Friday there are dozens of men that reenact the crucifixion of Jesus Christ by being nailed to a wooden crosses with six inch nails.  The Philippine Government is warning that the nails used for crucifixion should be cleaned and sterilised.  Also, citizens are urged to get a tetanus shot prior to participating in this ceremony.

Some citizens that take part in such ceremonies also use a whip to lash their backs before being nailed to the cross.  The Government has also warned that the condition of the whip should be checked before the lashings.  A dirty whip could cause infection, Government officials noted.

With the United States economy getting worse, more people may be inclined to hide their life savings somewhere safe.  This story tells us that hiding your life savings in a haystack might not be such a good idea.

Apparently an Ethiopian farmer decided to hide his entire life savings ($12,000) in a haystack.  Apparently rats decided to eat 25% of his cash portfolio.

The farmer was repeatedly advised to deposit his money in the bank, but he shunned such suggestions.  In three weeks, the rats had eaten a sizeable sum of this farmers life savings.

Whether this man decided to start using banks is a mystery.  One thing we can assume though, is that he will not allow the rats to manage the remainder of his cash portfolio.